TOP ↑

ethelreds:

ok.  ”it had too much singing in it” is not an adequate criticism of a musical.  did u go in expecting something different??  wow lots of music in that musical.  wish they’d warn us about that.  maybe they should rename it. these singing spectacles needs to be referred to something that would indicate its musical nature.

like who are you.  where did you even come from.  go back to mars

homosocks:

shout out to the people who never unfollow me for some reason even when i never post anything relevant to their interests

(Source: sockleton)

elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:

benedict-cumberboob:

 

tokachiku:

hardcoreandmetalbitch:

One of the best scenes of Malcolm in the Middle ever.

that fucking kid took one for the team

i don’t remember this scene of breaking bad

Socialism: You have 2 cows and you give one to your neighbor.
Communism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and gives you some milk.
Fascism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and sells you some milk.
Nazism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both and shoots you.
Bureaucratism: You have 2 cows; the Government takes both, shoots one, milks the other and throws the milk away..
Traditional Capitalism: You have 2 cows. You sell one and buy a bull. You herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
An American Corporation: You have 2 cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow dropped dead.
A French Corporation: You have 2 cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.
Japanese Corporation: You have 2 cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called Cowkimon and market them Worldwide.
An Italian Corporation: You have 2 cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch.
A Swiss Corporation: You have 5000 cows. None of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.
Chinese Corporation: You have 2 cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers.
An Iraqi Corporation: Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them that you have none. No one believes you and they bomb your arse. You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of a Democracy.......
Counter Culture: 'Wow, dig it, like there's these 2 cows, man, grazing in the hemp field. You gotta have some of this milk!'
Surrealism: You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
Apathyologism: You have 2 cows. You do not care.
Fatalist: You have 2 doomed cows...
Atheism: You have 2 cows. There is no God.
A West-Country Corporation: You have 2 cows. That one on the left is kinda cute.
A Brazilian Corporation: You have 2 cows. You pay taxes for 6 cows. You have to sell one cow in order to pay the taxes. Your remaining cow gets sick and dies while waiting for availability in the public vet hospital.
Russia: You have two cows. Since they are both female, if you happen to keep them in the same stable you will pay a 5,000 rouble fine for homosexual propaganda.
PETA: You have two cows. You kill them both. You then use naked women to convince other people that killing cows is wrong.
Moffat: You have two cows. Both of them are your daughters time traveling from the past where they had a brief love affair with Da Vinci making you the rightful Queen of England. As you assume the throne, you throw them off a building.
Hussie: You have 2 cows. You ask for another one. Instead of getting just 1 cow, you get 2,485,506 cows.
Romney: You have 2 cows. You are not the president of the united states.
Once-ler: You have 1 cow. Everyone decides to make 5 different versions of that cow.
Old Spice: You have 2 cows. The cows are now diamonds. I'm on a horse.
An Irish Corporation: You have a million cows because they're everywhere
Tumblr: You have 2 cows. You ship them together and make GIF posts screaming about how much you love your cows, but they should stop existing because they are so perfect.
Also Tumblr: I give you a hamburger.
Night Vale: You do NOT have two cows. Cows do not exist. What's a cow? Show me a cow! That's not a cow! Who let you in here?
Tom Hiddleston: You have two cows. You are very sorry for them.
Thranduil: You do not have two cows, you have an elk. Riding on two cows is not majestic. Also the dwarves are on fire.
Dwarves: You had two cows but now they're on fire.
Bilbo Baggins: You did not invite those two cows for dinner.
Cows: The shit you go through.
This post: Started off as a post that explained different goverments but then everything changed when the fire nation attacked

literallysnokoplasm:

i really hate it when im reading a book and i picture the whole setting in my head a certain way and then the author mentions something which completely messes up the way i view the room or scene like a door on the left side instead of right or like a window which is only small instead of ceiling to floor or areas and landscapes on the road like cmon now i have to completely renovate the land in my head 

l0litaprincess:

Disney characters with their perfect Pokemon, by kuitsuku

alextoor

(Source: skunkandburningtires)

Yesterday I was kinda attacked by this cat I’m fostering who has been abused. He went absolutely crazy. He bit my finger and wouldn’t let go. There was a claw stuck in the back of my hand. I thought he’d done something really bad because there was blood all over my hand and it was coming out quite fast. I took the plasters off today and there’s these pathetic little marks but it’s so sore and swollen. I feel like an idiot for complaining about it so much :p

breelandwalker:

feliciakainz:

carryonmywaywardalpaca:

dearborns:

#how many times have I quoted this in my lifetime #far too many and still not enough

Guys, btw, this is an actual insult

if he calls your mother a hamster, it indicates that she is a fast-breeding rodent— you can get the insult there

and if he says your father smelt of elderberries, well, wine was primarily made from elderberries in the time of king arthur. he’s calling his dad a drunk

more you know

(Source: redlight--district)

twlboaj:

danganaddict:

c0nsulting-timel0rd:

totoislostinoz:

carry-on-my-consulting-tardis:

“What house?”

“Montague!”

“whAT HOUSE?”

“MONTAGUE”

“WHAT HOUSE?????”

“MONTAGUE!!”

“MONTAGUES! GETCHA HEAD IN THE GAME!”

The fact that someone else thinks he looks like Zac Efron makes me so happy.

That’s literally all we talked about in freshman English

WE WATCHED THIS IN SHAKESPEARE LAST YEAR AND THIS ONE GUY JUST YELLED “BRETHREN, THOU MUST PLACE THINE HEAD IN THE GAME” AND WE HAD TO WAIT A WEEK TO FUCKING CONTINUE IT BECAUSE WE KEPT CRACKING UP AND SINGING REWRITES OF THE HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL SOUNDTRACK

that and the scene where you see his butt is literally all freshman english classes discuss 

(Source: warriorclara)

jaceslittlegirl:

jay-z-r-us:

tumblr is great because I know the plotline of at least fifteen different tv series without ever having seen an episode

and I can probably talk about them and trick you into thinking I’m a huge fan of the show

(Source: adios-jay-z-r-us)

gerardgayofficial:

when u sing along to a song and then understand a metaphor

image

(Source: gerardgayofficial)

DOCTOR WHO + episode titles

9TH Doctor - 11TH Doctor

(Source: clarabosswald)

egg-rolls:

when u stand up 2 fast n suddenly ur floatin thru space n time